The roller coaster hit me hard, and somehow I’ve managed to
emerge on the other side happy, full of adrenaline, and somewhat whole.
I previously wrote how my job was making me unhappy. Not wanting to write is my worst nightmare. This job—sitting at a computer for hours typing in the same information—did just that. Even as I continued working there, I knew I had to leave. Soon.
What else happened? In mid-August, my colitis flared up for the
first time since I’d been diagnosed in July 2012. I can say now that it was a
learning experience because I know what to expect next time it hits. The most
difficult thing was that I could justify myself going to work. It wasn’t like
my boss was in the dark about the subject, her daughter has colitis, but it’s
who I am. When I was little and too sick to go to school, my mom would have to
hold me back from running for the bus. I can honestly say, in that
regard, nothing has changed.
So, when my job at the company ended, it was a huge relief.
What I needed was rest and lots of it
on my time away from working. I napped every day with Raven, my four month old
kitten, and by the end of the week interviewed at another company, and landed the
job. I would start Monday.
My new job is a breath of fresh air. It’s a small company with maybe seven people at most
working there every day, compared to the large one I was at before. We talk, we laugh, we get work done, we say bless you
when someone sneezes (which no one did at my other job, weird), we get to know
each other. Most importantly, I do different things. I answer and make phone
calls, I work with filing, I organize, and…GAH! Doing multiple things—scratch that,
LEARNING multiple things at a job, about a local company, is a privilege. All
of this I can take with me onto the next job, and the next, and the next.
Now, I’ve been wondering why my perceptions of jobs has
changed. This job by no means is my dream job, but so far I’m not dreading
going there (it’s only been a week, though, so we’ll have to see when that
changes!). I think I’ve discovered that in order to find time to write, I have
to force time to write, even if it’s in
small patches. I’ve discovered that writing is my priority, but while I’m
writing I can work, too, and gain more skills along the way.
Writing is what makes me happy, and adding it to my day is
by no means a burden. I’m sure you can understand. It feels good to finally
have answers to some questions bouncing around in my mind. But I’m still only
22, so there’s bound to be more—and soon!
